a mom's life final

hari ni pulak i want to tell stories about my little ones...the forth kid of mine...Norsharafana Liyana...sharafana sama makna dengan Sharifah actually..that's why i chose this name at the first place..i've got this instinct yang boleh agak my baby lelaki or perempuan..i don't know but empat-empat anak yang dilahirkan semuanya dah dapat agak lelaki or perempuan walaupun x pergi scan lagi...Alhamdulillah...kuasa Allah..kita hanya mampu merancang dan Allah yang menentukan..
Sepertimana kita merancang mengharapkan segalanya berjalan dengan lancar tetapi ada kalanya diri kita ditimpa sesuatu yang kita sendiri x jangka..sama dengan kelahiran Adek. Ketiga-tiga anak yang terdahulu dilahirkan secara normal. I also didn't have trouble with my pregnancy with Adek. Tetapi pada waktu tu I did feel like my body was aching so much...and susah nak tarik nafas dalam2..Sebelum pregnant I went to many specialist to know ape sebenarnya yang berlaku...but most of the doctors said...Stress...and even berubat secara traditional pun ada jugak yang cakap stress...So..I've done lots of things yang boleh bagi diri x stress...sampai di bulan yang ke-9 pregnant..Sehari selepas my sister datang sebab nak tolong jaga anak2 sekiranya nak kena pegi hospital untuk bersalin...i felt pain on my stomach..rasa nak terputus nyawa rasanya waktu tu...that was first contraction and then it slowed down..but untuk keselamatan me and my hubby terus berangkat ke hospital swasta yang memang dah diregister awal2. sampai di hospital tu..seperti biasa nurse nak tau bukak berapa..she said 3cm..so it was not the time yet..then the nurse put this alat untuk tau degup jantong baby dlm perut..about 5 minutes i think nurse tu check and asked why degup jantong baby macam lemah...then she called the doctor..i didn't feel the pain at all in that moment. The doctor pun x taula buat ape maybe tried to pecahkan air entuban ...in that moment yang keluar nya adalah blood...so muka doctor dah pucat..but luckily as a doctor he told my hubby...this case better be sent to Selayang hospital which is fully -equipped for this kind of emergency cases..I was scared already but still i did not feel any pain..cuma rasa darah kept on keluar ....so the doctor called the private ambulance which is so *****ing late..after one hour dah kitaorg tunggu kat hospital tu baru sampai...dahle we have to pay for the ambulance sendiri...luckily we both were fully prepared on the financial.
So bila dah siren berbunyi and for the first time in my life, merasa naik ambulans...sampai di Selayang hospital..i was sent straight to the emergency room where terlalu ramai doctors and interns yang mengkaji my case...rasa segan pulak.. but before that my hubby diarahkan untuk sign one document untuk maklumkan he agreed the operation to be done and when my hubby asked apa akan terjadi..the doctor cuma cakap we have to selamatkan the mother first, if the baby selamat that will be a miracle.....so the doctor asked me to bukak semua barang kemas and also my contact lense..and i was sent to one room dimana my hubby x boleh masok..when pada masa tu I really needed his strenght...I was so sad...memandangkan contact lense dah dibuka so i didn't really see macamana muka hubby waktu tu ...what to do...So after that ..all the operation preparation was ready for me...i've been given epidural...so sick of it actually..and it hurts... kena inject kat tulang belakang....but for my baby..dalam hati berkata...i can't describe my feeling in that moment..semuanya berkecamok...
bila dah dengar baby nangis..and one of the nurse tunjukkan baby to me yang dalam keadaan sedar tapi x dapat melihat dengan jelas ..cuma dapat tengok "pepek" baby..and I said to the nurse "eei nampak pepek.".and tersengih...and the nurse pun tersengih..Alhamdulillah...apa yang dilalui seperti satu igauan buruk yang tidak pernah terlintas di kepala...cuma my baby terpaksa di tahan di wad NICU untuk pemeriksaan lebih lanjut..and furthermore i was so x terdaya after the operation..maybe sebab darah dah terlalu banyak keluar.. then i was sent to recovery ward dimana untuk couple of hours di pantau keadaan ..Alhamdulillah jugak..then barula i was sent to ward biasa...my hubby just wait di luar kerana x dibenarkan jaga..nasib baik i can sleep..itupun sebab ubat bius masih ada kesannya lagi.

Rupanya "temunik" tertanggal awal dalam perut and that shouldn't be happened but it happened to me..tu yang menyebabkan pendarahan and baby dah kekurangan oxigen ..luckily kedua2nya dapat diselamatkan and masa ni hanya Allah yang tahu betapa bersyukurnya kami. cuma x dapat rasa lega lagi..sebab adek masih ditahan di NICU...the first day i was not allowed to see my baby..sebab nak angkat kencing pun x larat....all nurses yang buatkan..masuk second day i've been advised to walk slowly and move...so i did ...then the third day..i can walk already..but maseh kena pakai wheel chair sometimes especially bila nak tengok adek dlm kotak transparent tu....(i hate to see that view...sad actually) so i was released on the third day and sent to accompany my baby kat wad NICU sebab dia x boleh balik lagi...so i've been put to one room yang khas untuk mak jaga baby yang baru dilahirkan...adek was ok already..dah dilepaskan pakai tiub..but masih dlm pengawasan..she had a slight fever but later the forth day one doctor cakap my baby macam nampak kuning..then when they check memang betol dia dah kena demam kuning..so kena letak di bawah lampu2 biru tu..the first day cuma dua ...tapi malam tu adek merengek so..i put her beside me...malangnye that make her fever terus naik...and the doctors kena tambah lagi another 4 lampu untuk kurangkan kuning dia..i can't help myself and i can't help her in this moment...rasa nak balik rumah cepat2 tapi adek masih x sembuh lagi...luckily hari yang keenam di hospital ..fever adek dah xde tapi seminggu lagi kena datang balik buat check-up..lepas tu kena buat check-up once a month untuk pemeriksaan pada effect demam kuning pada adek...takut pertuturan dan pertumbuhan dia terbantut...Sekarang peristiwa tu dah dekat nak 3 tahun berlalu...Adek sekarang ni dah x dapat nak di stop dari terus bercakap..mulut macam bertih jagong...She is different...baik dari segi melahirkan die, rupa die, dan jangkamasa breasfed die pun lagi lama dari yang lain..yang lain cuma sempat menyusu sehingga bulan ke 2 tapi Adek hisap susu badan sehingga umur die 2 tahun....dia sihat dan cerdik ..Alhamdulillah...